Daddy Blogger Mad Lib
The other day I walked into the (ROOM) where I found my
(NUMBER) year-old child, (CHILD’S NICKNAME) playing with a (NOUN) in the toilet.
This frustrated me because I’ve tried over and over to teach him/her the
message that (CLICHÉ MAXIM). Unfortunately it seems like it’s going in one
(BODY PART) and out the other. It makes me want to pull out my (BODY PART)
sometimes. Not only that, you’d think at this age they would be potty trained
and I wouldn’t have to clean the (BODILY SECRETION) out of his/her diaper anymore.
The other day he/she dropped a man-size (BODILY SECRETION) that they proceeded
to wipe on the walls. I supposed this is just part of being a full-time parent.
I love being a dad, but if I was being honest, I would have
to admit that I like my (FAMILY MEMBER) more than my son/daughter. Hey, I’m
just saying is all. I know some might find this controversial, but it’s simply
the truth, and I’m not going to hide it.
Of course I’m no stranger to controversy after revealing
last month in a highly circulated press release I put out that I am a (SEXUAL
ORIENTATION). That was followed by a viral blog post which received (NUMBER) page views, and prompted at least (NUMBER) of
emails thanking me for my beautiful and courageous words. That’s why I blog—to help
others and because I love my child/children more than anything.
I have to say, it’s so humbling when moms at the (AN OUTDOOR
LOCATION) come up to me as I’m playing with (SAME CHILD’S NICKNAME) and tell me
what a good dad I am. It’s almost embarrassing, but I am grateful hearing this
from the mom community which I hold up on a pedestal.
It’s good to be appreciated as a dad no thanks to TV shows
like (TV SHOW) which portrays dads as a bunch of (ADJECTIVE), (ADJECTIVE)
(ANIMAL PLURAL). This is not who we are as fathers, and I for one refuse to
stand for it.
Did anyone see that TV commercial by (COMPANY)? When I saw it, it
made me feel so (FEELING), and that’s what prompted me to write a (DESCRIPTIVE FEELING)
blog post, “We Dads Are Not Dumb (TV or MOVIE DAD CHARACTER),” in response. Not
that I’m bragging, but the (NUMBER) page-views and (NUMBER) comments that post
got, I think proves how many people felt the same way.
I mentioned this same post in my panel with (ADJECTIVE) Dad,
(VERB and ADVERB) Dad, and (MOVIE TITLE) Dad at the (ADJECTIVE), (FAMILY
AFFILIATION/TITLE) 2.0 Conference in (CITY) last month. There was a lot of discussion surrounding this
topic, but it was encouraging to see brands such as (COMPANY), (COMPANY), and
(COMPANY) present so we could have a real discussion.
I have to say the conference overall was a positive
experience, and even though I didn’t think I could be taught anything new about
blogging I ended up learning that (CLICHÉ PARENT BLOGGER PHRASE). Also, it was a real treat getting to meet a
couple of mom bloggers I really respect, (ACTION VERB) Mom, and (DOUBLE
ENTENTRE FOR SEX) Mom at the (A QUIRKY ADJECTIVE) (RANDOM/BIZARRE NOUN) Party.
Still, despite all the fun, I felt sooooo guilty being away
from my little (SAME CHILD’S NICKNAME AS BEFORE). After all I am a father first
and he/she is why I blog no matter how long it takes to potty-train them.
Disclosure: My conference trip was sponsored by
(CONSUMER GOODS COMPANY) and their new (PRODUCT) for (ACTION VERB ENDING IN “ING”)
your kid’s (BODY PART). Also, don’t forget about the Twitter party giveaway
they are sponsoring tonight. Use the Hashtag #(ADJECTIVE or NOUN)DadsBSing and
you’ll be entered in a drawing to receive one of their products for free.